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Retrieved January 29, Retrieved April 22, Retrieved on September gay men stripping video clips, Sean "Seanbaby" Reiley was writing comedy over at Seanbaby. He's been a major list of gay pride marches on some of our best writers, and starting in April, he's going to be Cracked.

Today, we're gay men stripping video clips him to some of you, and reintroducing him to the rest, with his look back at some of the most disturbingly erotic old school games. Just like orphans and tap dancing, eroticism and video games were meant to be together.

Barrel-throwing gorillas and nudity are a perfect match, and sand paintings show that even as far back as ancient Egypt primitive man has been mixing pornography with Zaxxon.

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But "adult game" designers often cross the line between sexily risque and fucking lunacy. Some of the things and the breasts attached to them discussed in this article may confuse and frighten younger readers. If you are one of them, please stop reading and go play any of the games where you splatter the heads off of aliens with a rocket launcher. One day, a game designer was playing Tetris and said, "What if I was playing this type of game, but at the same time had a huge erection?

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It's a lot like Tetrisonly there's a strippung woman on the screen as you play. Also, as you do well, the game shows you screenshots of slutty women surrounded by flowers and screaming about bubble baths. While the screenshots you earn in Bubble Bath Babes are easier to masturbate to than any of the bonus screens gay men stripping video clips original Tetris gave you, they're still not that sexy.

When a badly rendered woman who clearly can't speak English is trying to seduce someone with puns about soap bubbles, it's an uphill battle.

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gay men stripping video clips It doesn't matter how attractive she is. Each level, the screaming women get more and more nude, losing a little bit more of their mind each time. So by the point of full nudity, you'll probably have to strap a straitjacket on her anyway. Not that anyone would know.

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Getting them out of their panties requires such a fantastic level of hand-eye coordination and bideo reflexes that it becomes a death trap.

Because if you masturbated using your amazing dexterity, there's a good chance it'll end with a pleasure-induced brain seizure and a fucking disturbing corpse for your landlord to find.

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This is a tit-based spoof of Street Fighter 2. Karate women face off in a pit fighting tournament where the winner takes home naked comedian louie anderson is gay of other women. Like in all fighting games, they come from varied backgrounds and cultures.

There's gay men stripping video clips girl in a swimsuit and matching bird-shaped hat, a fat pro wrestler, a ballerina in ken lingerie and a woman gay men stripping video clips just wearing a snake. Unlike other games where they come together for the glory of victory or the conquering of some retarded combat-dimension-thing, the fighting spirit that binds these noble warrior souls together is the fact that most of their martial art techniques revolve around showing their panties to one other.

There were a strippihg of half-naked people already in Street Fighter 2so the actual game doesn't even seem unusually erotic. Yes, I understand there is something wrong with an industry when a group of women kicking the crap out of each other in thongs is totally normal, but fuck that; I'm not a sociologist.

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I'm just telling you that probably nothing in this game is going to turn mmen on until you win a picture of a naked girl. If you can get off to this, I hope you're reading from inside something with a good lock on it. Unfortunately, that's when it gets a little bit creepy. Before the camera pans down her strategically blurred body, there's mmen inept attempt by the graphic artists to make it look like the girl's winking at you.

A stupid gay men stripping video clips of an eyelid slides over one eye then disappears. And I don't know if you've ever seen anyone wink without moving the rest of their face, but it looks less like flirting and more like a horrible sleepy-waky baby doll with a broken eyeball. You only earn pictures of naked women if you beat the game on a high level of difficulty, and the fact that strippimg character has gay men stripping video clips total of three possible attacks makes it hard to keep your enemies guessing.

And Strip Fighter 2 's controls are so unresponsive, you usually can't tell which of the ggay you're supposed tortuga del sol a gay resort be controlling.

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